“Andito Na Silaaaaa!” (They’re Here)

March 25th, 2009 by jaspercaesar

Napasigaw ang Ale sa may tawiran nang bumulaga ang mga palaka sa may imburnal pagdating ng malakas na ulan ngayong gabi.

(the woman on the crossing screamed like crazy when the frogs emerged from the sewers when the heavy rains poured tonight.)

Animoy kagwat ng kadakilaang langit ang sigaw ng Ale, na para bagang nanghahalina sa mga dios na ipag simula na ang tag-araw.

( As if the woman’s scream is a call to high heavens, her call lures the gods to let summertime start.)

Andito na sila!

(They’re here.)

Pagkatapos ng ulan at halakhak ng mga palaka, tag-init na.

(After the rain and the croaking of the toads end, it is summertime.)

Hubaaad na! Ibandera na ang mga katawang tag-init.

(Time to strip down and showcase the hot summer bodies.)

Andito na nga sila.

(Yes, they’ve really arrived.)

Hilarious Play

September 22nd, 2008 by jaspercaesar

I chanced upon this on youtube and I thought of sharing the script below. This will make you go crazy laughing.

(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t_W6Ek1OyGY)

Welcome to Intelstar (I badly transcribed from Bitoy’s funny performance)

We are all here in Interlstar simply because..there…simply because of this company’s singular vision. And our vision is – to become the number one advanced directorial assistance in the whole world. This, this is the company’s dream, and now it is also yours.

Our mission is to provide quality information to people on the globe, people on the go,u mayb interested to to know what type of information we provide.well, we handle a wide variety of information - from peoples addresses, to phone numbers, to movie listings to restaurant reservations, to concert schedules,traffic reports and what-have-you. And everytime a customer from any corner of the united states dials 411, and asks a question, we should always, always, always be ready with a quality answer.is that clear. I am asking a question, Is that clear? I wan to hear a big yes. Come on, is that clear? Thank you, thank you, very good. Way to go. Anyway,

Okay let us tackle our personalised touch in answering calls. Here in intelsar. We open each call with an introduction of ourself. Our standard line will be when we get a call is –

Hi. That is the greeting. This is Chelsea. That’s me. City and State please. That is our standard greeting. That s how we always begin our each call.Do you want to hear how I say it? Okay it is like this, I pick up the phone and say. HI this is Chelsea, city and state please. You like that ha? You like that. You want to hear it again? Okay.

Okay, as you can see, it is very important that we have, whaat?

Maam , yes? an american name. That’s right, correct. Its important that we have an american sounding name. Like Chelsea. I mean, what can be more american than chelsea.Right.Its mandatory that we have an american name here in Intelstar. Just imagine, just imagine, if I use my real name. okay it would sound something like this.

Hi.this is maria leonora teresa labrador bayot, city and state please. It doesn’t sound right. It doesn’t sound right.our customer wopuld suspect right away that we are not centrally located in the us.thats a big no-no. no, no. theyre not supposed to know that we are rom the other side of the globe. I mean, what can be more pinoy than maria leonora teresa?or bayot for that matter. Bayot is such a filipino name.it is such a giveaway, don’t you think?

So the first order of the day, I mean night,of course its night time already.is to choose ur american sounding name.so maybe we can have a series of…yes you. Whats ur name

My name is Teodoro albarille. Okay teodoro abarille. Teodoro. Teodoro, I think you can be a teddy. Teddy is good. You don’t like teddy. How about we shorten it to Ted. Ted? NO. How about Todd. You like it?Alright Todd.Todd is a good name. TOAD?? No. Toad is a palaka. It’s a TODD. Todd. Evry good, sit down.

A Simple Life

September 11th, 2008 by jaspercaesar

I enjoyed the very simple life I saw, partook of, and observed in the coastal towns of Sultan Kudarat.

Here’s a photograph taken at a beach of the Celebes Sea.

Makahiyak

September 10th, 2008 by jaspercaesar

One Visayan (Cebuano) term that I rarely hear nowadays is the term ‘makahiyak.’

It is actually a delightful feeling.

I must tell you: it is that feeling on your abdomen cramping or the muscle therein contracting slightly when the ferris wheel you are riding drops suddenly, or when the speeding car races downhill. It is the same feeling when air pocket happens while on a plane.

What other activities result into feeling makahiyak? Me wonders.

Please come to the rescue, my friends, and tell me.

I Confess

August 24th, 2008 by jaspercaesar

It is time that I admit to something obvious.

I can’t help it but tell you everyone I am really jologs. And to support this, let me share a jologs song I find terribly melodious with catchy lyrics.

I just wonder who recorded this first. I think Michael Laygo originally sung this and the rock group, Aegis, made their cover version.

Anyways, I wish to sing this in a future videoke fest with close pals. Hehehehe

Minahal Kita (I Loved You)

Noong una kang makita
Alam mo ba sinta
Ako ay nagalit dahil suplada ka
Ngunit hindi naglaon nakilala rin kita
Marunong ka rin naman palang tumawa

At ng kitay kausapin
Akoy nangangamba
Na baka ika’y magalit at umiwas ka sinta
Ngunit hindi naglaon nakilala rin kita
Hindi ka naman pala totoong suplada

Minahal kita hindi lang dahil sa maganda ka
Minahal kita hindi rin dahil sa maporma ka
Minahal kita lalong hindi dahil mayaman ka
Minahal kita sa taglay mong pambihira

Minsan akoy lumisan
Akala ko hirang
Iyong kalilimutan ang bakas ng suyuan
Ngunit aking nalaman
Buhat sa isang kaibigan
Ginagabi ka raw sa ating tagpuan

Minahal kita sa taglay mong pambihira (i loved you for your unique qualities)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vzyg0MCRXn4&feature=related 

Charlie Green Rocks!

August 18th, 2008 by jaspercaesar

On wowowee Charlie sang, "smile, what’s the use in crying?"

He is so adorable and he’s really got talent! I am a fan now.Listen to him render the standards. I honestly feel that your stresses are wiped out and you surely will smile.

Those who do not know him, Charlie is this 11-year old half Cebuano, half Brit boy who impressed Simon Cowell at the show, Britain’s Got Talent.

Surviving a Fire

August 13th, 2008 by jaspercaesar

14 August 2008, 2.10pm - I have not officially gone up my floor (midway
of Central Park) when the Fire Department has declared our building on
‘Fire Out.’

I was only in my Bench undies, when a strong stench
of burnt whachamacallit pervaded into my room while panic shouts
reverberated around as if I was on Titanic. I heard panting, wailing,
screaming just outside. For a second I thought it might just be one of
those condominium unit fires limited within someone’s confines. (This
brought me to my former officemate’s experience last year when he
exactly felt a similar thing when their boarding house burned down.
Now, I really know how it feels). But on second thoughts, it might be
serious given the reaction of people. So I peeped out, and to my real
horrors, all I saw was thick black smoke billowing within the lobby.
The lobby floor was already wet because the men around the area helped
to put out the fire using their units’ water supply.

I quickly
grabbed a soiled t-shirt and shorts, grabbed my wallet and two cellular
phones, took a last look at my unit and opened the windows because it
was so smoky already.

My next-door neighbor, a woman in her 50s,
came out shouting, was about to knock on my door (nice lady for doing
so), and asked everyone to leave. I checked the lobby and looked out of
the grills to see the upper floors. There were smoke and fire coming
out of the upper floors. Our floor lobby itself was in soot, and it was
surely hot, not warm.

We thought for a moment, all will be well,
but the shouts didn’t stop, and the smoke enveloped us on our floor. It
was time to make that important run.

I rushed out of my wing
fire exit, to my joy, it was abandoned, so it was easier for me to run
down. At this point, I made a quick SOS text to my closest family and
friends. Just so they know in case I won’t come out alive. However, I
knew I’d survive it. What went into my head at this point was: wow,
disasters do happen to any of us, and it can happen so quickly.

Kuya
V called in first, he was on my phone while I ran down the fire exit
that ended on the third floor level. I came out to the building edge
with only the emergency veranda hang. I looked up and some debris were
falling, there was no time to linger. However, on my peripheral vision,
I saw heads bobbing up from the high concrete fence - the guys from the
adjacent slum area. They were merely watching - as if it was some grand
spectacle.

And then it was time to make a decision - to leap
down or not and be caught with the falling debris. There was an
emergency railing that was suspended, perhaps two floors from the
ground. There were spectators looking at me - perhaps secretly cheering
me on to jump - and be safe from fire but not safe from harm’s way.

I
first asked Kuya V to hold the call as I jump. And boy did I jump. I
landed perfectly, without pain. Thanks to my jumping training over at
the Dagani’s house way back in Butuan. We would jump from their house’s
second level down to the ground outside. We loved doing this when we
were young, feeling like the superheroes from the Justice of League.

Hay
thank Heaven’s I wasn’t hurt. I even laughed at myself, telling Kuya V
I landed safely. It probably was the adrenaline rush that allowed me
such daredevil.

But while I was walking away, I looked up and
sobbed. It all dawned on me that I just survived a real tragedy. And
the Lord led me to safety.

Texts messages came in - three
friends and my brother all first thought it might just be some fire
drills. But they realized eventually it was all real.

I thank
all my family members, friends, former officemates who called in and
texted their genuine concern - inquiring about my safety and needs.
They all prayed for me and I thank them from the bottom of my heart: I
love you all! I feel really blessed to ave you all. Thank you for the
concern, the offer of support and comfort and prayers.

I stayed
at the gate, and the firefighters came in quickly. It was also the
chance of scavengers (thiefs) to sneak in, taking advantage of the
tragedy of people. Surely, things were lost. Hopefully mine are all
intact. I have not gone up yet as I am writing this story.

Let
me thank the Lord for the firefighters who were quick in responding to
our situation. I saw first the Pasay City firefighters, also the
Chinese volunteer firefighters. Im sure the makati firefighters
responded quickly,too. A friend of mine driving on EDSA texted me to
say EDSA littered with fire trucks - then he realized all those were
driving towards our place. Thank you very much, firefighters! We owe
you so much!

A few minutes after, ABSCBN came with their big
cameras to cover the incident. They stayed on for a long time. Both
cameramen looked very familiar - and why not - they were the gentlemen
crew of journalist Ces Drilon- the three of the, Ces included, were
abducted by the Abu Sayyaf in Basilan and freed just quite recently.

I
waited outside, just like how the residents did. Only a handful were
able to grab their things out. Everyone looked sad but hopeful.

There
was a lot of commotion and shouting just outside our front lobby.
Theories as to how the fire started spread like wildfire. The most
common was that it started from the trash bin. If this was so, how
stupid and inconsiderate of that smoking person to have thrown in
his/her lighted cigarette butt. Crazy world, but crazier people.

If the fire started around 11am, fire out was called before 2pm. But I heard that the upper floors still had some smoke.

Up till this writing, I have not gone up to check my unit and things because it still smells awful and its wet all over.

But I thank the Lord. Praise God for, hopefully, everyone’s safe. Lives are more important than things.

Thank you, Lord God, for I, we, survived a condominium fire unscathed.

I love you, Lord! I really do.

I luvv Sandara Park

August 10th, 2008 by jaspercaesar

Is she In or Out?
Sandy
I’ve always liked Sandara Park. Although she isn’t Filipina and was constantly crying during the Star Circle Quest (reality TV star search in Philippine television), I liked just the way she was. Yesterday, she was on TV - visiting the Philippines.

She’s now back in S. Korea trying to be make a name for herself there. I wish her all the best.

Wasn’t she cute whenever she waves and says in her flawless tagalog, "mahal ko kayo!"

Laugh Trip - English Translation

July 26th, 2008 by jaspercaesar

Here is what you call MADE IN CHINA ….

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Duh ?!!

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NAKU WAG KANG PAPANAKAW!!!…

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DELIKADO TO….. BKA MAGALIT..!!!!

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KAKALUNGKOT NAMAN…

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HAAY OO NGA NAMAN.. LIBRE NA NGA EH.. DAPAT LANG…

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KAW NAMAN KASI EH… PAG MAGPAPADULAS KA INGAT INGAT LANG..

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ANG GALING NAMAN SA KANILA KAHIT 70+ NA, PWEDE PA RIN MA-PREGGY.

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HALA .. HORNY KA BA DYAN .. ETO GAMOT PARA MABAWASAN. HEHE.

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O, DAHAN-DAHAN LANG ANG PAG-UNTOG SA ULO HUH…

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AY, TALAGANG HINDI. MASAKIT KAYA YUN!

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HAY.. WELCOME NA NGA EH …

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HELLO! MUSTA KA NA, PRODUCTS? HOW DO YOU DO??

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YUN NAMAN PALA EH. IF YOU WANT TO BE IN TROUBLE, JUST CALL 110. KUNG HINDI NAMAN, THEN BETTER NOT CALL 110.

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KUNG GUSTO MONG MASAKTAN SIGE LANG!!!

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NAKU PO INGAT!!!

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LORD OF THE RINGS BA ‘TO…. ?

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WAAAAAAAH.. TODO NA TO… ANG TINDI. KAHIT DEDO KANA, EXPECTED KA PA RIN NA MAGLINIS NG MESA .

Priest Blog A Hoax

July 26th, 2008 by jaspercaesar

Dear Friends,

The truth has come out in the form of an information shared to me by my real classmate-priest just today, 26 July 2008.

Fr. EMC revealed to me that there is an impostor who created the blog, Confessions to a Sinning Priest, to destroy his priesthood. He is not its author, and he does not own that particular blog.

After months of silence, he has stood up to counter this absurd lie.

Thank you, Father EMC, for finally standing up and putting an end to this madness.

Praise Heavens!